Damn I miss my long hair very much
Dear hair please grow a little bit faster
Cause I want you to be longer
You are my soul, when you were cut of
A part of me was gone
I miss you a lot!! ^_^
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Tick Tock Tick Tock...April has come to the end ^_^
Can't believe that today is the last day of April. Tomorrow a new month is opening its way, a new journey of life will be written down by everyone. As for me, this month was full of blast. April is a month of Awesomeness. A lot of wonderful memories were captured through out the month. I'm sure i will miss each of them. I'm sure there is time where i will not remember anything about it but i know i can always refresh my memory back reading my blog. ^_^
The beginning of the month, things already started to show that throughout the month there will be more joy to come. Indeed, it was true. I have a lot of fun times in this month with wonderful friends especially my awesome, wonderful girlfriends. I bet everyone else also having as much fun as we did. However, sadness never escape. So did our life, sadness never failed to drop by to say hi and stay for awhile. As time goes by, everyone in the school of my batch realize that there is not much time left to spend with each and everyone. Everyone is aware that the day we will have to say goodbye to each other is approaching us without we want to. It is a sad thing. For four years we learn, play and work together, we get to know each other better, we get to see the good and the bad side, there were even times when we quarrel, fighting and hates each other. But i believe in this month, all of that hardness, sadness, hatred are gone for good when everyone realize that deep in their heart there is love for friends growing despite all that has happened. It just that everyone was busy letting their ego controlling them, letting anger to control them. But the love of friendship has finally win the battle of hatred. That is when everyone start to ponder in their heart, sad to leave one another, wishing there is more time to spend time with one another. Believe me, i felt that too. I hope it wasn't too late to realize how much each and everyone in the class affecting our life. We learn from one another, we help one another, we care for one another though there is time we acted we are not. It's normal though cause we are just a human with our self pride and ego. I gonna miss you all, I hope no matter what happen, wherever we are, we will still be friends forever. Love you all..xoxoxoxo
The beginning of the month, things already started to show that throughout the month there will be more joy to come. Indeed, it was true. I have a lot of fun times in this month with wonderful friends especially my awesome, wonderful girlfriends. I bet everyone else also having as much fun as we did. However, sadness never escape. So did our life, sadness never failed to drop by to say hi and stay for awhile. As time goes by, everyone in the school of my batch realize that there is not much time left to spend with each and everyone. Everyone is aware that the day we will have to say goodbye to each other is approaching us without we want to. It is a sad thing. For four years we learn, play and work together, we get to know each other better, we get to see the good and the bad side, there were even times when we quarrel, fighting and hates each other. But i believe in this month, all of that hardness, sadness, hatred are gone for good when everyone realize that deep in their heart there is love for friends growing despite all that has happened. It just that everyone was busy letting their ego controlling them, letting anger to control them. But the love of friendship has finally win the battle of hatred. That is when everyone start to ponder in their heart, sad to leave one another, wishing there is more time to spend time with one another. Believe me, i felt that too. I hope it wasn't too late to realize how much each and everyone in the class affecting our life. We learn from one another, we help one another, we care for one another though there is time we acted we are not. It's normal though cause we are just a human with our self pride and ego. I gonna miss you all, I hope no matter what happen, wherever we are, we will still be friends forever. Love you all..xoxoxoxo
Getting my Deeds done one at a time
hohoho...So many things to do, to think..but i'm trying hard to just think of my FYP correction now although there is other thing that i need to settle soon too. for now to make my self in stress will only cause my work undone..by the way, why did the rain stop?the weather is damn hot, feels so uneasy now. whatever it is, i must and need to stay focus. Don't be shock if you will see posts from me so soon and a lot today. It just that i found it is way easy to let out everything in my thought. The best part of it, i don't even have to think about it. soon i write it out, soon i ignore it. Saving my time, mind and soul from tortures.. ^_^
Something i don't understand
All i wanted to know is WHY?why have to be like this?and why i'm still in this?I don't ask for this?WHY ME?am i that easy to be fooled?i'm just a human. I don't have any supernatural power to overcome this nor to change this. I wish i could escape from this. But it seem i'm forever stuck in this. People said as time goes by, everything will be ok, everything will heal, you will be able to forget and be ok again. BUt now i would like to say that time change nothing at all. Even as time goes, it is still will be there. It is not time that heal, it is not time that change things making it better. BUt you and me, we, us...When i'm in silent, didn't even argue back on something that you know it will hurts me, doesn't mean i don't know, i don't care. It just that i realize there is nothing i can do about it other than to accept it as a will from god for me. I don't know what would you think or say of me, even if it all bad one, it is ok for me, i will just accept it even it is not true at all. FOr me now it is ok if you don't know the truth behind everything about me, it's ok if because of what you think that make you hate, because i know there is one person knows me better. Nothing escape from his view, every single detail of it he knows. I will not stand there arguing with you and fight for my right but i will just stand there and ponder in my heart accepting everything. Because I don't want to argue with you or anyone anymore. To have myself alone hurt is better that to have everyone hurt. Arguement will always end up with pain. One day the truth will come out by itself..cause we all have a saviour that will stand for us. there is no need for us to be affraid of what others will think about us, there is no need to fight hard enough to make our self clear. Believe it or not, we will never be able to make so, we will only causing the arguement worse.
The story of sweet lover plum green tea...
Don't Promise to me that you will love me forever.
Don't Promise to me that i will be the only one.
Don't Promise to me that you will never able find replacement for me.
Don't Promise to me that you will never forget me.
Don't Promise to me that you will always remember me in your prayer.
Don't Promise to me that you will not stop to love me.
Don't Promise to me that I'm the one.
Don't Promise to me that you will not hurting my feeling.
Don't Promise to me that you will not leave me alone.
Don't Promise to me that if the person is not me you married with, you rather be someone else.
Don't Promise to me that you will wait for me no matter how long.
Don't Promise to me that you will mark your words and promises.
Don't Promise to me that you will not repeat the same mistakes.
Don't Promise to me that you will tell me everything.
Don't Promise to me that you will never give up on me.
MOST of ALL....
Don't ever Promise to me that you will go through this with me.
Because it really breaks my heart the most when you are not around when i needed you the most. You said to me, you will journey this hard times together with me, but all you do is running away from me. And all i can do is just to ponder inside. Holding myself together. It is not because what you did, the fault you did, did cheat and lies that hurts me the most. BUT those promises of yours hurt me. I have told you before don't promise me anything because for now you might able hold tight to those promises. BUt when bad things come, all of this will just be another sweet talk, sweet words of yours. BUT you wouldn't want to listen, you even asked me to trust me and just wait and see. AND now i am seeing that your promises are just sweet words of yours. You said you will love me forever and will not stop to love me BUT now you already hate me very much. You said you will never able find my replacement, BUT a month after break up you already with someone new. You said you will never give up on me, BUT as thing get worst, you leave me alone. I trust you very much and you know it is not easy for me to trust anyone. BUT you just smash the trust like it is something useless for you. You asked me to give in, to love you more, to trust you, You even blame me, find fault in me, saying i hurt you, saying that i don't love you because i said so, saying that i treated you bad. You even said that i have lost the person who love me very much, truly love me. AND i didn't see that person when we are together. ANd to that person, I would want to say that you only love me when i'm in my best. BUt as i'm at my worst, you no longer inlove with me. I once ever asked you, HOW MUCH DO YOU LOVE ME? You said a lot, with whole your heart. BUT now, where are you? Where is that love? All gone, VANISH!! And its officially declare when you be with someone else, inlove with her because you no longer want to wait and stay strong for the love that you said it was a true pure love from your heart for me. The climax of the story is when you said to me, I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE, I LOVE SOMEONE ELSE and I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH YOU ANYMORE. NOT for ONCE, NOT TWICE, BUT more than that, again and again...
To that person, I only HAVE 3 questions that i ever wanted to ask you since the day you are gone; DO YOU EVER MISS ME? DO YOU EVEN THINK OR WONDERING OF ME EVEN A SECOND? lastly DOES THAT LOVE YOU HAVE FOR ME REALLY VANISH?... i know i will never get any answers. BUT i know god will tell me one day. AND to that person I would want to say this :
"You don't have to ask me how much i love you, there is no need for you to give more to make me stay inlove with you. DO not ask me what can i give to you, Do not even ask me to give in. Because ON the DAY i said I DO, I meant it with all my heart. Because ON the DAY i said I LOVE YOU and YOU ARE THE ONE SENT FROM ABOVE FOR ME, that YOU ARE THE ONE I PRAYED FOR, IT is in fact the truth from me that never die. THE only thing you should always trust in me is when i said i love you and you the one i want to spend the rest of my life with. Because i was telling something that i can't say to anyone else but you. AND to that person, i want to answer a question of yours that you ever asked me before..my answer is, never even a second that you are not in my mind and heart"..and for another question of yours, my answer is...YES I DO, even NOW, it has never change since the rosary night"
P/S: I LOVE YOU
Don't Promise to me that i will be the only one.
Don't Promise to me that you will never able find replacement for me.
Don't Promise to me that you will never forget me.
Don't Promise to me that you will always remember me in your prayer.
Don't Promise to me that you will not stop to love me.
Don't Promise to me that I'm the one.
Don't Promise to me that you will not hurting my feeling.
Don't Promise to me that you will not leave me alone.
Don't Promise to me that if the person is not me you married with, you rather be someone else.
Don't Promise to me that you will wait for me no matter how long.
Don't Promise to me that you will mark your words and promises.
Don't Promise to me that you will not repeat the same mistakes.
Don't Promise to me that you will tell me everything.
Don't Promise to me that you will never give up on me.
MOST of ALL....
Don't ever Promise to me that you will go through this with me.
Because it really breaks my heart the most when you are not around when i needed you the most. You said to me, you will journey this hard times together with me, but all you do is running away from me. And all i can do is just to ponder inside. Holding myself together. It is not because what you did, the fault you did, did cheat and lies that hurts me the most. BUT those promises of yours hurt me. I have told you before don't promise me anything because for now you might able hold tight to those promises. BUt when bad things come, all of this will just be another sweet talk, sweet words of yours. BUT you wouldn't want to listen, you even asked me to trust me and just wait and see. AND now i am seeing that your promises are just sweet words of yours. You said you will love me forever and will not stop to love me BUT now you already hate me very much. You said you will never able find my replacement, BUT a month after break up you already with someone new. You said you will never give up on me, BUT as thing get worst, you leave me alone. I trust you very much and you know it is not easy for me to trust anyone. BUT you just smash the trust like it is something useless for you. You asked me to give in, to love you more, to trust you, You even blame me, find fault in me, saying i hurt you, saying that i don't love you because i said so, saying that i treated you bad. You even said that i have lost the person who love me very much, truly love me. AND i didn't see that person when we are together. ANd to that person, I would want to say that you only love me when i'm in my best. BUt as i'm at my worst, you no longer inlove with me. I once ever asked you, HOW MUCH DO YOU LOVE ME? You said a lot, with whole your heart. BUT now, where are you? Where is that love? All gone, VANISH!! And its officially declare when you be with someone else, inlove with her because you no longer want to wait and stay strong for the love that you said it was a true pure love from your heart for me. The climax of the story is when you said to me, I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE, I LOVE SOMEONE ELSE and I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH YOU ANYMORE. NOT for ONCE, NOT TWICE, BUT more than that, again and again...
To that person, I only HAVE 3 questions that i ever wanted to ask you since the day you are gone; DO YOU EVER MISS ME? DO YOU EVEN THINK OR WONDERING OF ME EVEN A SECOND? lastly DOES THAT LOVE YOU HAVE FOR ME REALLY VANISH?... i know i will never get any answers. BUT i know god will tell me one day. AND to that person I would want to say this :
"You don't have to ask me how much i love you, there is no need for you to give more to make me stay inlove with you. DO not ask me what can i give to you, Do not even ask me to give in. Because ON the DAY i said I DO, I meant it with all my heart. Because ON the DAY i said I LOVE YOU and YOU ARE THE ONE SENT FROM ABOVE FOR ME, that YOU ARE THE ONE I PRAYED FOR, IT is in fact the truth from me that never die. THE only thing you should always trust in me is when i said i love you and you the one i want to spend the rest of my life with. Because i was telling something that i can't say to anyone else but you. AND to that person, i want to answer a question of yours that you ever asked me before..my answer is, never even a second that you are not in my mind and heart"..and for another question of yours, my answer is...YES I DO, even NOW, it has never change since the rosary night"
P/S: I LOVE YOU
Flashback...that was its all about today...
Every where, almost everyone is talking about love. The ironic thing is i found new thinking towards love. Not a good one i bet cause some argued with me. Well thats my opinion from my experience. LOVE? One letter with a thousand meaning. One letter that can cause hurt so much in one life. Such a powerful word isn't? Some say love is a wonderful thing but to some it cause a long lasting pain. For me, there are two main sources of LOVE. One is from GOD. and one is from this earthly life. Both have significant effects towards human living, towards me and you. One lead you to endless happiness but one lead you to the wrong direction. and most of the time, it leads you to sorrow. Before this, i do believe in love. I do believe that there is true love, love at 1st sight. But now i don't believe any of that. Human love is vanity. It is not as pure as God's love for us. A person can always say he loves you with whole of his heart. But when you at your worst, that love fade slowly. When trouble comes, he choose to run away and finding new love to comfort him. Then when things back to normal, he is there for you again. For me, this kind of love only lies within the word. It is a sad thing to have this kind of love. I believe none would want to experience it. But thats the reality of life. So lets just find love in god, for he has always love us, no matter who we are, what we did, even when we left him, hurting him, he never stop loving us. Because his love for us is unconditional. Stop searching for earthly love, it won't last any longer. One day we all gonna leave this world, so do earthly love.
A comeback i called?
Halo world....finally i'm back again here. Starting from zero. Well past meant to be left behind or else future would never come. ^_^ Lets see...where should i start this first..maybe on the reason of my return perhaps. or reason i left this for quite sometime. which ever it is, soon or later i will say it out..ahahhahaha....lets begin my journey... cheers
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